Isn’t it true that when the Church has a crisis sometimes a Religious Community is raised up to assist the Lord in the healing that needs to take place within the Mystical Body of Christ? We were becoming aware with great alarm of the deep-seated brokenness that has come to the surface in the marriages and families of the Domestic Church. Most of us had been in residential child care between 25 and 40 years. That time allowed us the privilege of being in close contact with many families. It taught us that the woundedness of children was systemic and that pain, sorrow, deep hurt, mistrust and the questioning of one’s identity resided at the very core of the suffering in families.
Our children as young as they were, had many profound insights about family as well as their own lives. One ten year old boy put it this way: “A therapist can help me solve problems and understand my feelings and behaviors, but only Jesus can get to the very center of my heart to heal me because only He can understand what I cannot say in words. I want Him to heal my Mom as well. I have forgiven her!” A little three year old girl was weeping and said: “My Mommy and Daddy do not know how to be a mom and dad. Please find me a mommy and daddy who will take care of me, instead of me taking care of them.”
Little by little we began to understand that Jesus Who is the fount of all Mercy wants to pour out oceans of grace upon families who come to Him. But, St. Paul says: “How can people receive faith unless it is heard? How can it be heard unless someone is sent?”(cf. Romans 10:14) We prayed that God would raise up a community that would love families in their brokenness and somehow work with them to bring about a renewed wholeness. In a million years, never did we ever dream or give it a thought that God would ask us!
In 2003 our beloved Community was recalling us to Connecticut to assist in the apostolates that were in need of sisters. Leaving these families would be a bitter-sweet experience for us: Bitter-because we surfed the internet looking for a community to take our place in residential child care and our saddest discovery was that no communities in the USA did this work any more; Sweet-because we would be geographically close to our Community again.
Yet the sadness about leaving the children and families without finding a religious community to take our place was a most painful experience. We could only find solace in bringing this need before Jesus in the Tabernacle. We spoke to no one about this change that would soon begin to take place. We did not want this situation to become negative publicity that would have an adverse impact on both the children and their families. We had always treated them with dignity and in many ways worked with them to bring about wholeness with the hope that their children could return home. The relationship with our children and families was paramount in how this move would take place and be a positive experience for all involved.
Understanding the above, our employees committed to respecting the way we wished to handle this challenge. Each day, the employees prayed that God would not abandon the children and their families. They prayed that God would reveal a solution.
Before we knew what hit us, the extraordinary began to occur in our ordinary everyday life “rocking the boat!” We had taken our children to a couple of different events. On each occasion, we met a priest whom we did not know. One began a conversation with us, asking questions about the work: “How long did the children stay with us? How much work did we do with the families?" etc. For a bit we discussed the plight of families and then the priest said: “You seem to have a very clear understanding of what is happening in families. That tells me that God is calling you to begin a community not just to work with children but with the whole family.”
The second event we were invited to was called, “A Day for the Healing of Families.” The priest at this event said to me: “This morning during prayer the Lord told me you have something very heavy on your heart. Do you want to share it?” I related the sequence of events that had been occurring. When I finished, he said as he pointed at me: “Look me in the eye! I would never tell a sister to leave her religious community but I am telling you to do it!” He repeated these words three times still pointing at me. He then said: “Every community in this here United States has left child care leaving these families high and dry. You need to work with the entire family. If your sisters are faithful to prayer and community life God will protect you.”
These words were shocking since none of us had prior conversations with this priest. These two occasions became a new exercise of trust and faith. It became a new kind of encounter with the living God. He called us, revealed something new to us, then it seemed as though He went into hiding, waiting for us to take a leap of faith. This whole experience brought us ever deeper into Adoration of Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament, prayer and the reading of Scripture with a deeper concentration-searching for answers and asking the Lord to reveal the next step.
After much time in prayer, I called a priest, whom I knew well, to ask for his advice. He said to me before I could begin to speak: “Let me first tell you what God wants of you. He is asking you to break away from your present community and begin a community to work not just with children but their families as well. And by the way it is five of nine for you right now. Pentecost occurred at 9:00. When 9 o’clock strikes for your community, there will be a great Pentecost, a powerful out-pouring of the Holy Spirit upon the sisters and the apostolate. Now run-along and do God’s Will.” I was not sure where to turn next.
But what are the odds of having a Canon Lawyer volunteering on the staff! She had received her canon law degree at the Angelicum University in Rome. We asked her if the Church even allowed sisters to break away from their communities to do other work. She took on the responsibility of getting all our questions answered from the Congregation of Religious in Rome.
With the support of our Bishop we continued the child care during the discernment process. On Sept 3, 2003 we met with the superiors of the present community to set up articles of agreement of how our time would be lived in relation to them during the discernment process. On September 15, 2003 the Feast of Our Lady of Sorrows, we applied for non-profit status. We became a Private Association, called the Daughters of Mary Mother of Healing Love at 3:00 P.M. the hour of Divine Mercy on September 19, 2003, the feast of Our Lady of LaSalette. We were granted permission to be clothed in the habit on September 29, 2003-the Feast of the Archangels Michael, Gabriel and Raphael. On the Feast of Our Lady of the Holy Rosary, October 7, 2003, our Pastor, received our first promises made as Daughters of Mary Mother of Healing Love.
After a two and a half year period and a number of meetings with our original community, canon Lawyers and our Bishop, we were granted an indult from Rome on Ascension Thursday May 25, 2006, signed by Pope Benedict XVI. We were now an independent approved Private Association. On April 11, 2007 Bishop John McCormack signed the Statutes of the Daughters of Mary Mother of Healing Love and on March 25, 2008 the four founding Sisters professed their perpetual vows as the Daughters of Mary Mother of Healing Love.
These experiences began to draw us closer together. Little by little we understood that the unity we were experiencing, among ourselves was more important than how many we are, how much we can do and how many apostolates we could open immediately. We realized that the Holy Spirit was showing us that the first and most important step was being of one mind and one heart like the early Christian Community. As Mary the Mother of Jesus was the center of the hearts of the early Christian Community, we knew we could not do this apostolate unless She was at the center of our hearts. Then and only then can the Holy Spirit descend upon us with a fiery love for each other and the Church.
Eventually, the child care landscape across the nation began to change. Many of the children and youth that were in group homes were being placed in families. We, too, could no longer financially weather the storm. We finally made the decision to close residential and instead take day students from the public schools who could not remain in school because of behavioral, emotional and social trauma. And so began our work with families in a different way, opening the door to the future work in the Domestic Church. Starting with four sisters, God continues to give us growth not only in members but in ministries which serve the healing of families.
Only under Our Lady’s guidance will we be able to initiate Her plans. She no longer wants us to solve problems or find solutions on our own. She is asking us to work from inside Her Heart sitting at the foot of the Cross. Here, She can teach us how to reach the hearts of so many of Her suffering children.
All I can say is: Lord, thank you for this journey. Thank you for granting us the gift of faith so that we could set out into unknown waters and like Your Son Jesus say to You: “Father I want to do Your will not my own.”